Remember I promised that we’d talk about all the exciting stuff going on in my life? Well, now’s as good a time as any right?

Except I really don’t want to talk about it.

I’m scared. Even when good things are happening I am afraid. Mostly of the unknown I guess.

In a nutshell…my dad who I haven’t seen in 5 years is coming to visit me in a few weeks. I mailed a letter to the son I gave up for adoption 19 years ago inviting him to contact me. I’m transitioning from being a stay at home mom to the salon manager in my husbands hair salon. And to top it all off, after a 7 month break from church ministry I’m considering a volunteer position in the youth group.

Two of the above things would probably freak most people out. The other two maybe not so much. All of the above are good things. Any of the above would be enough to stress me out…let alone all four happening at once.

I know I’m not the only one who experiences this kind of thing. We all get overwhelmed by the unknown sometimes. Our imaginations can run wild.

Fortunately we serve a faithful God. And this is what He says in the 13th verse of the 41st chapter of Isaiah,

For I am the Lord your God

who takes hold of your right hand

and says to you,

Do not fear; I will help you.

 

Oh how I needed to read those words today.

It reminded me of a time about 2 years ago when God answered one of the pleas of my heart. I was going through a rough time and kept thinking/praying, “If only I could feel God’s hand on my shoulder.” I was looking for some kind of assurance that He was there with me.

I don’t remember how many weeks I pondered this thought, asking for a physical touch from God.  But one Sunday as I quietly prayed this familiar prayer the lady sitting behind me in church  reached up out of the blue and put her hand on my shoulder.

I knew it was a direct answer to my prayer. I was so overwhelmed with God’s goodness and His extravagant love. Tears of gratitude fell down my face.

I later asked Debbie (the lady sitting behind me in church who I didn’t and still don’t know very well) why she had touched my shoulder and she said she didn’t know. It just seemed like something she should do.

I have never forgotten the feeling of God using Debbie’s hand to allow me to feel His touch, His presence.

But sometimes I need to be reminded to remember. Isaiah 41:13 was that reminder today.

We don’t serve some distant apathetic God. We serve an ever-present God who loves us. He hold’s our hand and says, “Do not fear, I will help you.”

In my life, change is coming. And that means that I am vulnerable. That means I must face the unknown.

This would typically be a great time for me to have a break down.

But instead I choose to rest in God’s love. I am waiting and I am trusting.

I’ll keep you updated.

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